Just the beginning of a story I began but never finished yet

In the beginning there was light, and a gentle voice. There was whiteness and blackness and every hue of the rainbow, and yet no color at all. There were soft, simple sounds and harsh creaks and then it was all blended together into noise that just was. Nothing more. It was there, and everywhere, with the color and the absence of color. Somehow there was silence, a sort of buzzing, humming silence, then the real kind that made every movement vibrate the still air. Somehow I could not hear the voice; it only vibrated in a dull blur of pleasantly indistinguishable sound. If any words were spoken, none were perceived. They, along with the color and the smell of lilies and roses that both was and wasn’t at the same time, only blurred together in something that was both good and bad; both pleasant and impossible to bear. Somehow it was there, then somehow it was gone, and when I woke again, if it was an awakening, there was nothing. Not even blackness- just an infinite expanse of an empty mind full with invisible thoughts, if any at all. Just silence- true, wondrous, sumptuous silence that can be enjoyed only at first; only in the few minutes before it turns into tedium. Endless delirium. Being there and yet floating in nothingness. Perceiving what was not there, what never was or had been there, here, or anywhere. Just, simply, an empty mind incapable of thought or feeling or movement or wanting. Incapable of every possibility a mind, human or other, can come up with.

I've only just realized....

After re-reading all of my old posts on this blog, I realized just how much I have changed since the beginning of seventh grade. My style of writing seems to be changed, at least a little. Instead of 17 or 18 or even 20 blog posts each month, I have 3. I no longer dislike my teacher as much- this realization coming at the opportune time of the day before the last day of school- also our last day off before summer. I really enjoyed reading back over my memories- some of which I'd forgotten. I've been slacking off since my break from blogger for Lent. I'd been contemplating whether or not to quit blogger. But now that I've read my previous posts, I've decided not to. I love being able to recount my days, and see how I have changed. I'm looking forward to beginning 8th grade, and again blogging my progress and ideas and daily accounts- accounts that will hopefully include a new dog. And of course, posting during the summer too, although less frequently, as well as celebrating my one year blogoversary.

Thanks to all my followers, too, for supporting me and this blog. I've only just realized how precious it is- and will be in a couple of years, even in a couple of decades- to have a blog like this one.

Dogdom (and VACATION) Approaching...

Tomorrow just may be one of the best days ever. Because, it's the last day of seventh grade. And I just may get a dog! But then I may also get a dog on Saturday instead.... or Sunday.... or maybe even the Friday after that..... or the Saturday after that.... or the Sunday after that.... or the Friday after next Friday...
Well, I think you get it. I have a 98.9% chance of getting a dog this summer. Just exactly WHEN this summer that special day will be, is impossible to know. That's the problem with adopting from a shelter. You never know when you'll find the dog that makes your brain tingle and your eyes fuzz up. The dog that just thinking of fills you with so much energy you have to hop around for a minute to be able to think clearly again. So I'll be crossing my fingers all day. And tomorrow I'll be bumped 3 feet into the air 2 last times. Riding a bumpy school bus certainly has at least one benefit. Nothing wakes you up to the day better.

There Is No Such Thing as a Perfect Day

Yesterday, my church had a festival at the amazing Casa Italia Grounds. It was the closest thing to a perfect day possible: my best friend Mimi was there (and a certain 'kolega' who sat on a blow up ring and ate pizza with his friends, Mimi do you remember who?). There was also a petting zoo, complete with donkey, llama, bunny, chickens, sheep, pigs, ducks and GOATS (ahh, those loveable goats).

Here are some pictures of the petting zoo (I took over 300 of the animals alone, of course I won't post all of them):

These cute chicks were quite soft once you got the nerve to touch them (this means getting over the look of their sharp little beaks).

This little chickie could've been the sibling of the two pictured above. Some cruel kiddie stuffed him into a red bucket with some water in it, and the chick couldn't get out.

Now he's (or she's) free! Mimi got the chicken out of the bucket

Somechicken I presume is mama of the above chickies

Two other chickens. There was also this GORGEOUS brown and black chicken who had to go into their van for some reason before I managed to get a picture.

There were two ducks too

This cow calf had the most gorgeous eyes. Poor thing was underweight! Its neck and side was just skin and bones.

 

See that amazing eye?

 

The goats and sheep loved stuffing their faces into my camera. Observe.

This is one of the few sheep that liked being in my pictures

YOU guess what this goat is thinking

This sheep is very photogenic

Some pictures need no description :)

'Nother photogenic sheep

A sassy llama

Sheep loved to stick their noses into my camera!

This donkey was so calm through all the little kid's screams

The little kids (as in goat babies) were just so adorable!

Especially when they tried to eat us.

Another sheep!

Cuteness beyond measure!

This would be my best picture EVER if that girl hadn't gotten into the background! A second after I clicked the shutter she grabbed the poor goat into a tight embrace, proclaiming how perfect it is.

Guess what this goat did right after I took this picture? Note the intensity of desire in the little thing's eyes. This poor goat was limping around so the people who ran the petting zoo brought her inside the truck.

I still have MANY more pictures, but my internet is acting up so I'll post them tomorrow.

Now on to why this wasn't a perfect day.

After 8 pm, my mother received a phone call. I heard only my mom's part of the conversation and assumed someone had died- maybe someone my mom works with. Then I went out to the garage with my dad and forgot ALL about the phone call. Until I came back inside and saw my mom sitting worriedly on the chair. I asked what had happened. So she explained to me. She said that Adam and Jill's mom (note: fake name, these kids are twins in my class) called her. The first thought I had was, is one of them dead? Or someone else from my class? Then my mom carried on. Their mom called to say that Fred's (again I freaked, was my friend dead, note fake name again), Fred's mother was dead. She died on Saturday night of cancer.

I only met her once. And she was amazing although I don't remember too much. But imagine being a 13 year old boy. Your mother is dead. The only good thing about this is, she had a disease so my friend and his family knew it was coming. But my friend's brother is having his graduation tomorrow. And there's so much she won't see of her son's lives! I remember thinking last night- will I ever see the same goofy carefree Fred again?

I was expecting Fred and his brother to stay home today- they didn't. Fred didn't act too different- mostly still goofy and carefree with his unruly mop of hair. But in some moments- I could see the grief. Everyone was helping him and supporting him, but when their attention strayed I could see that he had changed. Who wouldn't? He smiled so often and the smiles seemed natural- he still goofed off and commented in his thoughtful way. But he missed his mother.

Words can't describe death. They can't justify it. I can't describe how I feel right now and how I know Fred is affected although maybe hasn't realized it all yet? I'm not too personally affected- but I feel so sorry for Fred and his family.